Most of us can relate to that uncomfortable feeling when someone begins espousing strong views that differ from our own. In social situations, there are a range of topics that might make us uncomfortable including politics, religion, the school system, etc. And people often just walk away from these ‘heated’ topics to avoid a conversation, rather than listening and learning.
In the workplace, when working through difficult organizational issues, we can’t walk away. We need to find ways to listen and work together for the benefit of all. If we feel discomfort, it may be because someone is speaking in a manner that conveys that they feel they are ‘right’, which might cause us to ‘get our back up’ and feel they are ‘wrong’.
all have different points of view – let’s accept that and use our differences to develop a richer perspective and better outcomes. need to take our discomfort and work through it. also have to give up being ‘right’ and, rather, strive to be collaborative. And this takes good character. Perspective is not about right or wrong, but let’s not forget the importance of accurate facts which are significant, and should be central to the conversation.
How can we take a more positive approach to discussing difficult topics? To have an interesting discussion, and expand our perspectives?
Here are some words we can use when we differ:
- The facts that can be useful to this conversation are…
- I think I see it differently than you do. Can I share with you my perspective, which is a bit different?
- My perspective (or experience) is different from yours, for example…
- Another way to look at this is…
We also need to listen to each other. Not superficially, but really listen and be open to the possibility of ending up with a richer perspective and better outcomes. To promote discussion, try these words:
- Help me understand your point of view a bit better…
- What I hear you saying is…. is that correct?
- That’s an interesting perspective, can you tell me more about that?
- What experiences have you had that brought you to that conclusion?
If your organization could benefit from some team coaching on working through differences, give me a call.
Sincerely,
Kathleen Redmond
905 478 7962
Interactive Online Learning Program:
Becoming Your Authentic Self at Work
Facilitated by Kathleen Redmond, MA, MCC
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